This Is How It Feels

There were a few times when I almost got to this page to blog a new post, then decided I will not do a half-hearted attempt. Okay fine, I'm just a little busy. It's edging nearer to exams. About 5 weeks now. :(

Anyway, my long case presentation last week was fine, the Dr marking us was very nice so we got off alright. Interesting case I got though, diagnosis was pleural effusion, but the interesting part was trying to figure out what was the cause. Was it due to her chronic renal failure or was it new heart failure causing fluid overload? Or did she have a pneumonia? How about malignancy? Hmm...

I have to do another assessment (which should be presentation + examination in front of the consultant) tomorrow. Sigh, tis is the life of a medical student; full of assessments, reports and learning to perform on demand under scrutiny and pressure. I feel like an actor sometimes. Let me tell you, it is not glamorous at all, it is nothing like on House or Scrubs - it is made up of blood, sweat and tears. 

Now that I'm nearing the end of 5th year, I can feel the other different aspects of working life seeping in... I have had my share of difficulties in this rotation. Things like how to work in a team with colleagues who can be very different from you. And that one has to slowly work up the rungs before you can be acknowledged. Other things like your patients might not always like you and guess what? It goes both ways as well. But hey, I always try my best to be nice to my patients. If you don't like me, sorry-lah.

I want to end this post by reminding myself - this is how it feels to be a medical student. I don't have too long more till the end of the road, but yes I want to remember this feeling, so that in the future, when I'm on the higher end, I will do my best to help and teach them. 

Because I remember how it feels like.