Live & Let Die

University is probably one of the last stages of life where the friends you make are more likely to be real and true.

Too bad, mine were taken away from me prematurely.

Seeing the photos of the people here having some fine last moments with their university friends in the months leading up to the end of medical school (finally!), I envy them. How nice it must be to have the same group of friends that you are comfortable with throughout your whole medical school.

I can't believe I'm still thinking about this now; but somehow this feeling that it was something that was not meant to be haunts me in a way that I can't quite explain. I suppose it's grieving. In hindsight, what I went through the first year here was perhaps the few stages of grieving: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.

I hope I have come to the last stage because I don't really want to regress to any of the stages. With a few more months to the end of medical school, I suppose it's time for some closure.

Live and let die.

Yay~!!!

Thank the Powers To Be, I had received a job offer from Charlies in WA today! ^v^ I am so so happy and so relieved!!! Perth is where I want to be. :D

I can finally sleep in peace knowing I have a job next year! Now, I am just hoping for my good friends to get a spot in Perth too!!

Life is good! ;)

Just Me

...i have just learned how sharply and painfully difficult it is to come home to a dark, dusty and empty apartment alone at night, and knowing that the same thing is going to happen tomorrow, and the day after that, and the day after that. it doesn’t matter how loud or filled with people the preceding hours of the day were, or even if i’m brimming with happiness as i step through the door — it is an acute and exhausting acknowledgment when i brush my teeth and get ready for bed that tonight it’s going to be just me... 

Was just reading Quaintly.net and this part of her post sums up exactly how I feel about long-distance relationships. She has managed to put her emotions into beautiful strings of words that stir up sentiments within.

I know it's gonna be hard, it is hard.

But great things are worth fighting for and we will continue holding on to the faith that one day we will be together again. And when that day comes, we will appreciate it even more, because it has not come easy for us.

One, Two And...

Round Three tomorrow. Hope?

I wonder if it's a lottery game of luck or does it really boils down to how good you have done in your studies, CV and their essay? We will see tomorrow, I suppose.

Well at least I had really tried my best. My philosophy is if you never try, you have ZERO percent chance of success. If you at least try, you still have a better chance than if you never try at all.

I have never been a compulsive email checker especially on my iPhone. But recently, I have been checking it a few times a day, hoping to find a glimmer of hope waiting for me in my email...

I must stay optimistic!

Plateau

It's funny how cynical I used to be. Not sure how different I am now actually.

But I think I really believe that optimism brings good luck. So stay optimistic!

Ironically, in another area of my life, I feel hopeful yet somewhat resigned to fate. They say there are highs and lows but I feel numb. Plateau - that's the word for it.

Do you think it can be fixed? Or does it even need fixing in the first place?

Dare I?

Am currently in my second week of psychiatry posting. Am not hating it since it's pretty cruisy, but am not loving it as well, coz it's just not my cup of tea.

I either get too emotionally involved when patients tell me their sad stories (I really feel sorry for some of them! sigh) or I get too bored with the mundaneness. The interesting moments are few and far in between and probably involves me being fearful that the patient will lash out suddenly and punch me. heh.

Well, I really should study during my free time but procrastination habits die hard. :( Am spending lots of time watching Masterchef Australia online. :P

On another note, second round of internship job allocations start tomorrow for most states. Dare I even hope?