Sunday, July 12, 2009

Fickle Time

Feeling like I'm in my own little bubble, separated from the outside world.

This must be what it feels like to have what they call "social isolation".

Might be having "anhedonia" too... Or izzit that I just lack the things that normally bring me pleasure?

Oh no.. what is psych doing to me! @.@


Haha sorry just being a bit crazy there. After doing a surgery rotation, psych just ranks okay on the like scale.

It's not tat I dislike it, but I don't exactly love it, that's for sure.

It's always interesting to see when the patient do bizzare or funny things, but other than that, it's just okay.

And I can't believe that I used to consider psychiatrist as a possible career option. Hmm...

I find it difficult to take history from psych patients. Either you can't interrupt them coz they are having pressured speech, or they just are tangential (jumping from a topic to next) or they just don't want to talk to you. Not really easy to understand them also. And yes, a lot of them are at the least very circumstantial (ie long winded).

Oh well, tmr will be week 5 so another 4 more weeks to go. Must learn to talk more fluently in front of others!! Have an observed interview and a case presentation exam coming up soon! haha and I don't feel like studying much for it at all. bleh.

Then there will be campus week, which will be quite free for me as I went to the lecs already last time. So can have a break I guess. Then up last will be my last and toughest rotation for this year, General Medicine!!

Then study break then major exams of the year! Then holidays and home!! ^^

It will be another 7 weeks before Dear comes over to visit and do his elective. Seriously can't wait!!!

Can time pass a bit faster? It feels like ages when I'm doing psych. A stark contrast to surgery, when 8 weeks just felt like it flew by.


Btw did I tell you I hate change? I see a pattern forming in me. It's not really healthy. I really need to cope better.

Time to grow up. Although I don't really want to.


Li Yann said...

Hi Zizi,

I know what you mean bout talking fluently in front of others..during phase 1 we don't have to do much presentations at all but when I join BMed, it's presentation to this commitee and that commitee...sumore got viva!!! Imagine my anxiety & panic attacks...cuz I'm not the type that can BS my thru things at all! >_< (don't have that sort of talent mah.. ;P)

But desperate times call for desperate measures, you'll slowly learn to adapt and to get the hang of things..It's always the most difficult in the beginning when you dunno what to expect from urself and from others...But from my experience, as long as you're willing to learn, you'll definitely improve! :)

Another important thing I learnt from BMed is self-motivation. Cuz all 13 of us are doing different projects, so we're all progressing at different paces. Sometimes when ppl's research are progressing smoothly and urs meets a stumbling block, it's easy to feel down or unmotivated about it...But you gotta learn to pick urself up and push on forward. Tho there are ppl there to guide you along the way, ultimately the decision lies with you. You've already shown great courage all this months, you gotta stay strong and keep the faith!

Gambatte!! We're always to here to support you mah! Distance is no barrier to friendships. :)

Take care & XOXO

P.S: I'm trying to out-type Pui Fun this time.... ;P

Zzzyun said...

haha dearest Yannie,

i dunno whether u out-typed Fun onot lah but thank you for ur loooong comment! :)

u know, when i hear myself presenting during pbls etc, i really hate how i sound like. sounds so stupid!! and i dunno how only can improve lo.. my voice just doesnt sound as nice/smooth as some of the angmohs =/

oh well. just gotta get thru with it i guess... hopefully with more practice, will sound at least better.

self-motivation! dont all of us need a good dose of it! lol. but i guess really need to motivate myself to study (even tho i might not like the rotation a lot)... coz exams are comin! o.O

anyway thank you for alwix being there for me.. i will try to be stronger...


fun fun ^_^ said...

Hahha.. Dun worry li yann I'm not trying to out-do you muahaha...

Basically what LY said is what I think as well. Learn as you go... No effort is wasted when you're learning.

As for the angmoh's speaking, dun compete with them. Why try so hard to speak like them? If you can, good for you. If you can't, no big deal! We're asians and it's a fact that we'll find it difficult to speak English so fluently like water flows from the streams. Come to think of it, how many Asians can speak English, and then how many westerners can speak asian languages? Be proud of yourself. As long as you know the stuffs, it's ok.

Continue to work hard there... It pays, really.

Zzzyun said...

Dearest Funfun,

haha thank you for ur comment as well! wah 1st time not super long :P

actually i dont find it hard to speak english fluently in normal situations, it's just when it comes to presenting or when i feel that im expected to perform, then i get nervous and i stumble over my words...

really need to work on it, man.. i can foresee lots of situations later in life where one is expected to do public speaking and presentations in our career as a doctor. why is life for doctors so hard =(

well, thank you for the encouragement! will hvta continue to try my best! ^^

take care!

fun fun ^_^ said...

One way... Practise and practise giving speeches.. in front of mirror...


Zzzyun said...

hmm... might work...haha but dunno got time to practice that onot..

but just an excuse hor? :P

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