The Ad that Moved Overseas Students to Tears

Thank god for the internet.

Happy Chinese New Year!

Here's to a belated Happy Chinese New Year to my readers! Paiseh, I know I have been a little sluggish/lazy in blogging in this new year. 

This CNY has been a relatively quiet one, but it's okay, I know CNY is not really so much about the angpows or the food (though I wouldn't mind more of the former of coz! :P) but it's more about family. If there's anything I learnt from being away from home during CNY for the past 2 years, it's probably this.

Treasure your family before it's too late, okay, peeps? If there's anything medicine has taught me about life, it's about the mortality of life. Life is fragile and can be taken away anytime.

So don't live with regret - make full use of your life and live every day as though it's your last!

I Want To Remember

Am currently nearing the end of my elective, with only another 2 days to go. I have been 'fortunate' to see a lot of interesting signs here - it is especially exciting when it matches what you have been reading in books - almost like meeting an old friend you once knew.

But I keep reminding myself, all these signs (usually) come at an expense to patients. I think it's important as healthcare workers to at least once in a while slip into your patients' shoes, reminding oneself that what might be routine and mundane to you is actually scary and a wholly new experience to your patient. 

When you start thinking of your patient as a real person instead of a disease waiting to be treated, then perhaps, you would be a little kinder at that difficult patient who seemed hell bent on making your life a living hell. Stop back and think, why is the patient acting this way? Is there some misunderstanding? Is there something bothering the patient? Or is there something you can help the patient with? Perhaps you might find your answer lies within those questions.

In med school, we are often taught to be 'professional', so as to provide the best (unemotional) care for our patients. It is a very real thing to get burnout from all the painful horrible things you see happening to people by being overly empathetic. But medicine is not only a science, it's also an art. And if you ask me, it's the latter that's hard to imitate. It has to come from the heart.

When does being 'professional' means being less human? I think it's still important to engage emotionally with your patient, coz with a good doctor that really cares for them, it is said patients feel almost half-healed after the encounter. However, as with all things, empathy should be doled out in moderation as well. A healthy work-life balance is essential to keep the enthusiasm for life going.

Two and a half years back, I remember what I wrote in the little box provided for each person in our batch magazine. I want to remember the reason I'm doing medicine even many years down the line. Now two and a half years later, I'm glad to say that I still remember.

Let's hope I would be able to sustain these thoughts for a long time more.

I'm Still Here :P

Hi guys! Don't worry, I'm still alive! This must have been the longest I haven't blog in a stretch, especially when there are no exams looming around.

Anyway, I am currently in my 3rd week of electives in Singapore, I'd just finished 2 weeks of Emergency Medicine, which was really an eye-opening experience. Today I just started in General Medicine which has a more set schedule compared to the former. But I do like it when I can control my own time :P

If there's any recurrent theme to my elective experience so far, is the massive amount of knowledge I still don't know. le sigh. Don't even need to mention about retaining the knowledge previously learnt. >.<

I need to study... but I feel so lazy. This will be the last of awesome proper holidays. Singapore is great, I feel it's like a representation of what Malaysia could be. 'Could' is the all important keyword here. It shows that it has potential but lack the ability. Do you think it will change in the not-so-near future? One can only hope.

Anyway, I think I'm digressing here. One of the reasons I haven't blogged in sucha long time is that I have been busy (what else is new?) meeting up with friends. It's certainly nice to see old friends. Maybe it's because I have a life for once too. :P Oh and a lot of time spent travelling around as well. Been trying to figure out the public transport system of Singapore.

That's about it. Is this considered a dry update? Perhaps. But I have not been getting enough beauty sleep. *grumble mumble* :P

And yeah, I hope 2011 will prove to be an awesome year! My last year of med school. Gotta make it count. :D

A Better Forward

Today, my previous uni had a Christmas party and I was kindly invited as well.

It's nice to be in an atmosphere where most people knew each other and the general feeling is of joyful familiarity.

Looking back, this year, I realised that I have stopped the blaming game and the regretting. It's much better to look ahead and put my best foot forward. And because of that, I have come to appreciate what I do have, and to live and enjoy the present the best I can.

The other thing I also realised is that people can change for the better, despite how impossible it may seem previously. Perhaps that quote by Anne Frank can be held true; "I keep my ideals, because in spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart."

I think that, instead of preconceived notions, if you look hard and long enough, people will eventually show you their good side. Perhaps.

Wishing all my readers a very merry Christmas and a happy blissful 2011! :)

Interval

I know, I know, I haven't been the best role model blogger. But hey, I'm having a good time just chilling and doing the things I wanna do.

Anyway, I just finished my 2 weeks of paeds elective, which was really good. The dr asked a lot of questions and taught quite a lot too, so I really did get a lot out of these 2 weeks. :) And now, I know a little better about dengue and H1N1, cause the ward was full of them the past few days. 

I am currently writing this from a little town called Batu Pahat in Johor. Will be visiting old friends for about 2 weeks or so before going over to Singapore to start my one month long posting! And it's so good to see dear dear again after sucha long time. :D

Alright, that's all for now. I expect updates to be sparingly for now, for I realised that I write more when I'm emo. lol. And let's hope that's not the case for now.

But sometimes when the mood kicks in, write I will. Right, toodles!

Paeds Elective

Just got back from a 4D 3N family trip at Cameron Highlands. It was kinda boring actually coz I'd been there last year as well with my family.

But oh well, just enjoy the cool breeze there then and spend time with family. 

Anyway, I will be starting my elective in paediatrics tomorrow. boo... I want more holidays. haha. But okay lar, hope I get to see cute babies! :D

Passed!

Apologies for the long absence, I have been too busy enjoying my freedom. But I bring good tidings with this post!

Results just came out today and I PASSED MY 5TH YEAR!! :D

I feel so so relieved now. This year has been such a difficult year, and I'm glad I can look forward and move nearer to my goal now.

I hope all of my friends passed as well so we can go to 6th year together!!

Never

I should have known it was too good to last. I was foolish to think otherwise. But I guess there won't be so many long holidays after this one. 

I find it silly of me to keep thinking that the next time will be the charm, cause for some things, they will never be. Naive heart. Anyhow, it looks like some humouring is in order. I need to tell myself that I'm bigger than this.

Oh right. Results will be out in a few days' time. The truth will be out soon. Hope that goes well, at least.

Home ♥

I'm home!!

It's so nice to be home. Everything is so familiar. I had to spend 5 hours waiting in a very hot and humid airport though, before catching my flight from KL to Penang.

Anyway, when we first arrived in the airport, it took us sometime to get used to the situation back home. It was what I would describe as a reverse culture shock. Ironically, I knew I was home when there were rude waiters, spicy food, endless perspiring and dirty public toilets. Needless to say, some of them are not things to be proud of though. sigh.

But all things aside, I'm just super relieved that the freaking scary exams are over. This year has been such a long and difficult year. Hopefully, with some luck, I will be able to pass. Cause, seriously, I can't imagine having to do all of this all over again.

But now, I have at least 2 weeks to have a much needed relaxation with my family! :)

Over

IT'S FINALLY OVERRRR!!

Now, would you excuse me, I have a plane to catch in 5 hours' time. Need to get some shut-eye.

Will update once I'm back home! :D

珍惜

Enjoy this short clip based in Malaysia. Brings me lots of memories of the good ol' days.

爱，就不要放手。远距离爱一点都不容易，但我要相信我们是可以的。

Next Up

The coming of tomorrow heralds the coming of the second paper. (woohoo I just made a simple sentence sound cool, okay sorry all the study is going to my brain -__-")

Not so confident about tomorrow's paper though, coz the area that can be asked is just so broad... And my preparation for it is less than for the previous paper. Sigh. Oh, and I'm not a big fan of opthalmology or oncology, it just makes things harder to go into the brain. Must be natural resistance. 

Okay, I dunno what I am crapping about.

Let's just hope they ask common stuff (that I know the answers too - that would be even awesome! haha)

Right, this mad lady better stop typing now. Wish her luck though! (now why am I typing in the 3rd person??)

Burnout

One down, two more to go. I feel scared... but seriously, it looks like everybody also don't have the mood to continue slogging.

I think it must be burnout.

Motivation, come to me please!

Okay, one more week and I'll be home! Must pass!!

Remember When

One of the most touching and beautiful songs I have ever heard.

I hope our love story will be like this too. :)

War

Tomorrow, it all begins. The exams that we have been preparing for what seems like forever. (obviously over-exaggerating lah haha)

First paper is tomorrow, which is O&G + Paeds written paper. These two subjects take a bloody long time to study, you know!

Second paper is next tuesday, which includes General Practice, Opthalmology, General Medicine and Oncology. Oh no, haven't studied much for this!! AHH!!

Last and scariest is OSCE next friday. 16 stations, 7 minutes each, running one after the other. Definitely going to need the adrenaline to kick in for this one!!

Wish me good luck and that I have the confidence and calmness of mind to deal with all this!

Previously, it had all have been battles but this is WAR!

PS: Wah, banyak-nya exclamation marks in this post! :P

2

I am having a headache now post-nap due to being unable to get to sleep the night before. Damn these sleep disturbances when I need my sleep already! Wish I have some sleeping pills.. >.<

By the way, did I mention I hate studying opthalmology?? Arggh.

Two more days left. AHHH!!

4

FOUR more days till the most major exams ever! Get ready to FREAK OUT!

We were discussing about the exam yesterday night (sorry, nothing else on our brains lately). 

Don't you think that it is ironic that this is the exam that we have prepared the most for in our entire lives, and it is also the most worried we have been. :O

We must have confidence in ourselves that we can do it! Okay?

Familiarity

Was randomly watching some videos celebrating festivities in Malaysia.

Very touching indeed.

It's simple things like this that make me think of home. Home will always be familiarity. How people look and talk. I still turn back to look when I overhear someone speaking in a familiar language/accent.

Sometimes I can't help but feel sad that we have to go overseas to look for a "better life". I know you can say we don't exactly have to. But given the circumstances back home, it's definitely a better option for now.

But how I wish that I need not choose between better opportunities and familiarity. I can always try to fit in here... but somehow I feel there will always be at least a slight gap.

I wonder if there is any use in hoping that one day, one day the situation at home may change.

Insomnia

Been having terminal insomnia last week (means I keep waking up much earlier than expected). And now I'm having trouble initiating sleep even when I'm super tired. :(

Sigh. Anxiety mucho. I think I need some of those relaxing strategies we always talk about in GP practice.

I want a good sleep!!

Btw, exams in less than 2 weeks. Die.

I want to pass. I NEED to pass!!