Monday, February 18, 2008

Till Now And Forever I Remember

This is another tribute to my teacher. You can read the previous entry here. And it's really sad that we never took a photo together.. *sigh*

-----------------------------------------------------

Today, I went to visit my beloved teacher's grave for the first time since he passed away. It was also the first time I visited the christian graveyard in Youth Park.

After stumbling upon his grave, the photo of his face plastered on the cold black marble stone seemed to bring back many memories.

Too many memories just came flashing back...

He loved telling stories of his past years. And he was a great storyteller - his face would be full of emotions and his voice's intonation would change with the pace of the story. Till now, I still rmb many bits and pieces of his wonderful stories.

It pains me now to think of the fact that he kept hidden from us the fact that he was suffering from bone cancer all this while. How long had he known? I really wished that he had let us known the truth earlier.

So I might have had the chance to be able to talk to him for one last time.

But I don't think I could bear it. When I was standing and looking at his kindly smile in the picture, tears had already started filling my eyes. I think I'd have broken down in front of his bed.

I don't think that I could bear that one of the adults that I'd admired most while I grew up was going to die. In front of my eyes. And I could do nothing abt it.

NOTHING.

It made me realised the fragilty of life. And how helpless and miniscule I was.

Then I realised why you did it, teacher. Why you didn't want us to know about your illness and continued teaching while you could. You didn't want us to suffer, right? You were your usual kindly selfless self till the end.

-----------------------------------------------------

Do you remember how we met, teacher? I would like to say it was Fate - you can laugh if you want - but I still believe it was Fate that brought us together.

We had always laughed together about the weird antics of the "fat girl" staying beside my house. [well she really was obese ma...and really smtg wrong in the head!] You didn't want to teach her after a few lessons, becoz you felt she was wasting your time with her weird "attention-seeking behaviour". oh yes that was what you said.

And my mum so happened to meet you while you're on the way out from her house. And after my mum enquired abt your services as a tuition teacher, the rest is history, so they say. I had known you since I was a little girl of 9.

How many years has it been since?

12 years.

Twelve years of friendship and trust. You had touched my life as I am certain the same way you had touched many others.

Till now and forever, you shall be fondly remembered in my heart. I still miss you...

4 comments:

k33LaLa said...

May ur teacher rest in peace...dont be sad dear~

lynnx01 said...

Life and death. It makes me wonder at times.. how thin the line is between life and death.

Zzzyun said...

kee> i hope he is at peace now too.. well cant help but be sad when someone close to you has passed on.. sigh*

lynnx01> the line is rather thin, isn't it? the fragility of life. we really shld live life to the fullest!

eluent said...

mayb thats why ur teacher didnt wanna tell u guys abt his illness...

coz he had hoped that u guys wouldnt be so saddened, filled with grief by his death...

he was a marvelous teacher. he touched ur heart in many ways that many u urself didnt know...

but that's ok... isnt it?
so cheer up~!

( i suppose ur teacher wouldnt b glad to knoe u're somewhere some-place, emo-ing and NOT STUDYING... hee~!)