I was re-examining myself last night, about my thought and emotional processes. A little reflection once in a while is a healthy thing.
Thanks to the bf who was doing a good job in enlightening me on certain issues. :) I feel that I can tell him almost anything and everything, and he will not judge me for it, but instead give me his thoughts objectively. Thanks, dear!
I realised that I have started out from a good standpoint, with a good intention... but somehow when things did not go my way and I did not receive the things I want, my intentions became skewed.
I felt that I needed to be acknowledged for my effort and work. Which in essence is wrong. It is not a competition. Coz I should be doing these things because I want to. Not because of the compelling feel that I need to.
I should remember the parents who appreciated me being there for them, when their child was sick. Who I sat with, talked to, sympathized with. Who happily thanked me when they were ready to go home. The children who recognized me, who I played with.
Who am I to think all these selfish thoughts? People are selfish essentially, there is no denying it. But you can limit the extent of your selfishness. I should open my heart a little wider.
If there is one good thing to be said about me, it's probably the fact that I often reflect on my own thoughts and emotions... and hopefully change for the better. That's why I'm always trying to live life the best way I know.